Old News

[Surf314]

Local medics call it a successful procedure when engineer Caffeine Powered's operation was completed this Sunday, making him into a heavy.  Caffeine had been threatening to get the operation for some time.  When rival construction teams were asked if this worries them they responded "Meh." 

Kor's cries of "get on the fucking point" were finally answered this past Tuesday, leaving him so surprised he forgot to get on the point himself.  Kor has been blamed for the defeat that followed. 

Scotty Grayskull finally came out of the closet today, surprising no one.  No word yet as to whether he will be dropping an "R" from his name.  This could be related to a scout with a pink baseball bat and makeup seen in the area.

[jorge]

lolwut

[exanimo]

lolwut

He has "news" in his signature, and is posting his old news here since he is limited by space. GOT IT?!


Nice dick.

[jorge]

o i c

[Neonie]

These are nice man 

[Surf314]

People were enjoying them so I thought I'd create a topic to dump the old ones so they can read them if they missed em.  ;D

[Surf314]

Cries of "need a dispenser here" were finally answered with the construction of the 24th dispenser in a local gravel pit.

A man has recently been released from a hospital after treatment for a freak accident involving a “unit enhancement” device. Sources claim that a pressure build-up inflated his pectorals giving him “man-boobs.” Witnesses claim he has been spraying pictures of his injuries as a warning to others.

A fight broke out in a mess hall between Really Soft Sweater and an unnamed co-worker when the co-worker pointed out that Sweater was actually wearing a jacket because it zips up. A Sweaterologist who was called in to settle the stand-off confirmed that it was indeed a sweater-jacket. “Sweater” has been urged to change his name or find appropriate attire.

[ScottyGrayskull]

HA! Hilarious stuff! Love the no-scope line.

[Mission Difficult]

The no-scope might have been your best yet. +1!

[copulatingduck]

:O

[Vandamguy]

definatly like the noscope

[Eschatos]

definatly like the noscope

definatly like the extra "/move]" at the end.

[Surf314]

[quote author=Vandamguy link=topic=141.msg9401#msg9401 date=1212150385]
definatly like the noscope

definatly like the extra "/move]" at the end.
[/quote]

It's exactly 800 characters, which for some reason the board hates, so unless Scotty can help me fix it - or you can point me to the one character I can sacrifice at the alter of comedy, you will just have to live with it.

[Vidaroke]

this is great

[ScottyGrayskull]

[quote author=Eschatos link=topic=141.msg9419#msg9419 date=1212157288]
[quote author=Vandamguy link=topic=141.msg9401#msg9401 date=1212150385]
definatly like the noscope

definatly like the extra "/move]" at the end.
[/quote]

It's exactly 800 characters, which for some reason the board hates, so unless Scotty can help me fix it - or you can point me to the one character I can sacrifice at the alter of comedy, you will just have to live with it.
[/quote]

I see you have two spaces after each period. Nobody would really notice if you only had one.

There! Helped! ^_^

[Eschatos]

Replace "been dead"  with "died".

[Surf314]

Replace "been dead"  with "died".

That didn't even make sense! Editing FTL.

[Surf314]

Area sharpshooter Zoso has been caught watching other people’s porn at great distances through a monocular.  When it was suggested he get himself laid Zoso responded that his penis can’t reach that far but he will attempt to no-scope it.

Public safety officials would like you to ignore the plague of drunken penguins seen about recently.  They are just the result of Ainmosni trying to combine beer and Linux and should be harmless.

A large number of scouts have died recently from wrench wounds to the head.  Police are looking into a possible connection with a string of unused dispensers that have been self destructed.

WTF head Joel has stated once again that CopulatingDuck is not a furry, but has asked that if anyone see him to tell him he wants his porn back.

Last TFNews for a bit, I got too much on my plate and would like not to feel pressured to make new ones every week

[copulatingduck]

would like not to feel pressured to make new ones every week

[Surf314]

[quote author=Scott Ramsoomair link=topic=141.msg27935#msg27935 date=1217984705]
would like not to feel pressured to make new ones every week

[/quote]

My secret is out  :'(