very important send help

[Radio Raheem]

so i got these frozen pretzels and theyre philly style or something. but they stay cold in the middle. is this how philly rolls? it only sayd 30 seconds and if i try much more they turn to leather. help please

[ToiletDuck]

oven bake that shit

[Vongore]

change the mode on your microwave, there are usually buttons that look useless on top of the board. Press the "Bake" one (it usually have a bread on the drawing) and wait until you think it's ready

[Radio Raheem]

also this

Big Nads Ghey Dads vs. the terribles
On one hand, BNGD has the second best team name I’ve ever seen (the first being Knights of Goku). On the other hand, TT has Travis “Poopinator” Parks. I’m just going to flip a coin here, and say BNGD will take it.

5-3 Big Nads Ghey Dads

[A. Crow]

eh, lower the power on your microwave (cook for longer at 50% power) or bake em in the oven.  seriously?  you came here for pretzel advise?

[Radio Raheem]

no the problem is my microwave doesnt have a power lower

[ribozyme]

no the problem is my microwave doesnt have a power lowerer

fixt

[Vongore]

eh, lower the power on your microwave (cook for longer at 50% power) or bake em in the oven.  seriously?  you came here for pretzel advise?

pretzel are awesome, they deserve advice

[Benito Mussolini]

Speaking of microwaves, there was this conference at school about microwaves.
It was fucking awesome

The guy first put a light bulb into the microwave oven, and started it. After like 5 seconds, the lightbulb lit up, and we were all amazed.

So the guy takes the lightbulb out before it explodes, and continues on his conference.

The guy continues on how you can make plasma in a microwave, so some guy in the audience goes, "I got to make plasma after putting the lightbulb in the microwave for like 5 minutes, once".
As a very responsible engineer, the guy takes the lightbulb he used and set the microwave timer at 5 minutes and starts it. After 2 seconds, the lightbulb is filled with an ionized gas (PLASMA!) that glows purple, then blue, then green, then.. BAM.
The guy stops the microwave in panic, and doesn't open it in case some dangerous gas happened to be produced.

We then watched that video about how boiling water in the microwave can kill you because the water stays at the state of water after 100°C because of pressure-temperature balance bullshit.
So you can get water hotter than 100°C out of the microwave because the water is in a stable state. However, as soon as you touch it, it all goes boiling at once, ending in a mignific explosion of water hotter than you can imagine.
The guy mentionned people burning themselves after putting their tea that has cooled off in the microwave to heat it up. Thing is, they put it in the microwave oven like 2 minutes, for one cup of tea. Result: stable, yet water above ebullition point. As soon as the person dips their spoon in the water. BAM, no more face.

After the video, the guy finally opened the door only to see the damn lightbulb fixed at the microwave's door.
Apparently, the lightbulb's glass started melting, and the inner gas' pressure kept going up. So some air got to pierce the bulb in one place and all the extra air got ejected, throwing the bulb at the door, its melting glass hardening on it.

I took a pic.  <---- FU, Duck, it's on my phone

[A. Crow]

go buy a new microwave that isn't crappy, you can get a fully featured one for like 40 bucks at walmart. 

[Honest]

Speaking of microwaves, there was this conference at school about microwaves.
It was fucking awesome

The guy first put a light bulb into the microwave oven, and started it. After like 5 seconds, the lightbulb lit up, and we were all amazed.

So the guy takes the lightbulb out before it explodes, and continues on his conference.

The guy continues on how you can make plasma in a microwave, so some guy in the audience goes, "I got to make plasma after putting the lightbulb in the microwave for like 5 minutes, once".
As a very responsible engineer, the guy takes the lightbulb he used and set the microwave timer at minutes and starts it. After 2 seconds, the lightbulb is filled with an ionized gas (PLASMA!) that glows purple, then blue, then green, then.. BAM.
The guy stops the microwave in panic, and doesn't open it in case some dangerous gas happened to be produced.

We then watched that video about how boiling water in the microwave can kill you because the water stays at the state of water after 100°C because of pressure-temperature balance bullshit.
So you can get water hotter than 100°C out of the microwave because the water is in a stable state. However, as soon as you touch it, it all goes boiling at once, ending in a mignific explosion of water hotter than you can imagine.
The guy mentionned people burning themselves after putting their tea that has cooled off in the microwave to heat it up. Thing is, they put it in the microwave oven like 2 minutes, for one cup of tea. Result: stable, yet water above ebullition point. As soon as the person dips their spoon in the water. BAM, no more face.

After the video, the guy finally opened the door only to see the damn lightbulb fixed at the microwave's door.
Apparently, the lightbulb's glass started melting, and the inner gas' pressure kept going up. So some air got to pierce the bulb in one place and all the extra air got ejected, throwing the bulb at the door, its melting glass hardening on it.

I took a pic.

[CaffeinePowered]

When I saw the title of this thread, I thought radio was asking for help because he got kidnapped by the gay mafia or something

[Benito Mussolini]

When I saw the title of this thread, I thought radio was asking for help because he got kidnapped by the gay mafia or something

He'd like it.

[Squishy3]

When I saw the title of this thread, I thought radio was asking for help because he got kidnapped by the gay mafia or something

when I saw the title of this thread,  I thought it was mr. grey

[Trace]

Um maybe try thawing them a bit in the fridge before microwaving

[Master Shake]

Get real pretzels in philly.  Totally worth it.

[rumsfald]

Get real pretzels out in the sticks of Amishville with me. Totally worth it.

I remember a few years back there was a story about one of the street vendors in Philly pissing on his pretzels cause he hated the tourists. Google fails me though.

Also, stop setting fires in Coatesville, J. They ain't gonna let you into the gang.