new stand up comedy vid

[zaneyard]

these videos make me love you long time grey
wanna hang out at soccer practice with me, honest and radio?

[MrGrey]

lol where is soccer practice

[Benito Mussolini]

lol where is soccer practice

Not sure... and I personnaly don't want to know

[zaneyard]

i'm surprised radio hasn't said anything about my comment.








oh wait i think he is re-installing windows.

[Blues]

Thread needs more BA DUM TSH.

[Benito Mussolini]

Thread needs more BA DUM TSH.

We almost hijacked this.
The people in this forum aren't fun at all.

[at0m]

[quote author=Blues link=topic=2747.msg78654#msg78654 date=1240521850]
Thread needs more UHN TISS UHN TISS UHN TISS.

We totally hijacked this.
The people in this forum awesome.
[/quote]Bloodhound Gang Uhn Tiss Uhn Tiss Uhn Tiss

[rumsfald]

I apologize in advance. Like a dog of Pavlov, I must lift my leg to mark my territory on the Posts of Grey.

Suggestions:
- Work on your low / quiet bits. Your trademark is your high energy pieces, which is obviously your natural talent, but having a few low moments will create better pacing and make your highs seem higher. I don't quite think that Steven Wright low would work for you, but something along that vein.

- The pro-abortion sign joke about the picture of the McDonald's flipper has potential, I want to laugh, but it is currently too long of a walk. Look for ways to shorten the trip to the punchline. I'm not saying either of these following suggestions are great, I'm not in love with them, but maybe they could give you something to riff off. *holds up a picture of Brittany Spears* I don't want my child to turn out like that. or . *holds up a mirror* I don't want my child to turn into a hateful asshole like you.

-The "quadruple entendre" joke is an excellent segue into a more explicit scrabble joke (aka, quadruple word score), or a more explicit Twister/Groupsex joke. Bonus points for both.

- Keep up the hard work - you have obviously been creating a lot of new material and been working on your stage presence.

[MrGrey]

i was waiting for your critique rum...

understand this tho... I am simply testing the waters on which works best, I am trying to find a happy medium.  I am figuring out the perfect method to get my point across while still remaining funny... the stuff I talk about is uncomfortable for most people so I'm trying to sculpt my craft.  All the "DUR DUR" jokes in the beginning are simply to  grab their attention... certain punchlines may need "work" however that is your opinion... I am doing the jokes which I think are funny, of course you will think a different punchline is funnier than mine because you have a different brand of humor.  However, I am trying to get a following  of people who enjoy MY comedy and MY art.  If i change and just try to please other people then all heart and soul disappear and its just another worthless pile of dane cook shit. 

In reference to the point you made about taking to long to get to the punchline, I agree, it does need work.  Know this though, the videos i post are mostly improv.  My process is the following:  I think about a particular subject and run with it and keep talking about it in my head.. i will jot down notes so i dont forget the jokes i come up with.  I continue this process until I get enough material and then create the show in my head.  If i have a showcase or a really big show I will take all my best material, write it down, and compile something better.  But what you are seeing is mostly "practice"

thank you though, always appreciated.