The "Fuck my life" thread

[Professor Funbucks]

My friend and I went out to get pizza, and on the way there we ran into my ex gf who was celebrating her birthday downtown.
I waved, her new boyfriend walked up to me and asked who the fuck i was. I replied "her ex, tell her i say happy birthday", to which his other friend comes on over.
She runs up telling him to stop, he hits me in the chest with a shittily aimed punch (i think he was drunk)
I punched him in the nose, and punched him in the eye. He's got two black eyes now and he was knocked out cold. I also broke his nose apparently.
The other guy went to get me, my friend punched him in the side of the head and he was knocked out.
We ran away and kinda talked about how awesome it was later.
But this is in the FML thread because I've been trying to stay friends with my ex. :/ I guess that never works out.
The kicker, she sends me a text later "Sorry, he just gets a little defensive"
what the fuck i didn't do anything we were going to get pizza not find where they are. I'm normally a harmless guy, but when you go to punch me, you better expect some retaliation.

Fuck that bitch, I'm deleting her off facebook and blocking her phone number.
Hell, she wanted to go have dinner with my parents sometime because she likes my parents, to which I replied "I dunno, you'll probably have to bring matt and his friend there in case i try anything crazy like ask for a dish to be passed to me."

[If-I-Die-Its-Lag]

Let's see...

Some homeless man ran into my car the other day because he wasn't careful.

I felt sorry for the man so I gave him a twenty for repairs to his bike.

[Luinbariel]

[quote author=Luinbariel link=topic=3709.msg122407#msg122407 date=1258184961]
I am so fucking sick of dealing with these people. If it is personal, I am further sickened; way to set an example, group of older adults.

Court time
[/quote]

Wish it were that easy. We have to prove somehow that the rental agency was intentionally making it difficult for us to sublet; all we can do is collect all the names and numbers of people who express interest in the place and hope for the best. We don't intend to pay rent again if they don't get someone in by the end of this month, and likely will go to court; whether or not we can win that argument is an unknown thing.

I have a big spreadsheet with all the information in it; it's getting bigger, already have like five phonecalls today after placing the at at like 2 am. People are definitely interested...

[Turtle]

have to take the computer in

[Neonie]

I felt sorry for the man so I gave him a twenty for repairs to his bike.

[Surf314]

My friend and I went out to get pizza, and on the way there we ran into my ex gf who was celebrating her birthday downtown.
I waved, her new boyfriend walked up to me and asked who the fuck i was. I replied "her ex, tell her i say happy birthday", to which his other friend comes on over.
She runs up telling him to stop, he hits me in the chest with a shittily aimed punch (i think he was drunk)
I punched him in the nose, and punched him in the eye. He's got two black eyes now and he was knocked out cold. I also broke his nose apparently.
The other guy went to get me, my friend punched him in the side of the head and he was knocked out.
We ran away and kinda talked about how awesome it was later.
But this is in the FML thread because I've been trying to stay friends with my ex. :/ I guess that never works out.
The kicker, she sends me a text later "Sorry, he just gets a little defensive"
what the fuck i didn't do anything we were going to get pizza not find where they are. I'm normally a harmless guy, but when you go to punch me, you better expect some retaliation.

Fuck that bitch, I'm deleting her off facebook and blocking her phone number.
Hell, she wanted to go have dinner with my parents sometime because she likes my parents, to which I replied "I dunno, you'll probably have to bring matt and his friend there in case i try anything crazy like ask for a dish to be passed to me."

Sounds like she needs to get a new BF. Which to be honest should be your response, something along the lines of "look this has nothing to do with jealousy but if you actually want to stay friends get a new BF, I have better shit to do than get in fights because your current bf is a dumbshit."

[Professor Funbucks]

[quote author=Professor Funbucks link=topic=3709.msg122430#msg122430 date=1258220837]
My friend and I went out to get pizza, and on the way there we ran into my ex gf who was celebrating her birthday downtown.
I waved, her new boyfriend walked up to me and asked who the fuck i was. I replied "her ex, tell her i say happy birthday", to which his other friend comes on over.
She runs up telling him to stop, he hits me in the chest with a shittily aimed punch (i think he was drunk)
I punched him in the nose, and punched him in the eye. He's got two black eyes now and he was knocked out cold. I also broke his nose apparently.
The other guy went to get me, my friend punched him in the side of the head and he was knocked out.
We ran away and kinda talked about how awesome it was later.
But this is in the FML thread because I've been trying to stay friends with my ex. :/ I guess that never works out.
The kicker, she sends me a text later "Sorry, he just gets a little defensive"
what the fuck i didn't do anything we were going to get pizza not find where they are. I'm normally a harmless guy, but when you go to punch me, you better expect some retaliation.

Fuck that bitch, I'm deleting her off facebook and blocking her phone number.
Hell, she wanted to go have dinner with my parents sometime because she likes my parents, to which I replied "I dunno, you'll probably have to bring matt and his friend there in case i try anything crazy like ask for a dish to be passed to me."

Sounds like she needs to get a new BF. Which to be honest should be your response, something along the lines of "look this has nothing to do with jealousy but if you actually want to stay friends get a new BF, I have better shit to do than get in fights because your current bf is a dumbshit."
[/quote]
Pretty much what I said. what a fag

[SBCrystal]

I got my bottom pinched by a drunk asshole and he and his friends almost fought ain.
They ruined a very awesome day.
Oh, and when I scolded him he called me mean words in Dutch "cunt, slut, witch". Pffft. Grote klootzakken.
Ain really did wanna kick the poop out of them but I didn't wanna have to throw down so we left. And they pushed him from behind! I am not impressed.

[Luinbariel]

I got my bottom pinched by a drunk asshole and he and his friends almost fought ain.
They ruined a very awesome day.
Oh, and when I scolded him he called me mean words in Dutch "cunt, slut, witch". Pffft. Grote klootzakken.
Ain really did wanna kick the poop out of them but I didn't wanna have to throw down so we left. And they pushed him from behind! I am not impressed.

LAEM

>:C

[Surf314]

I got my bottom pinched by a drunk asshole and he and his friends almost fought ain.
They ruined a very awesome day.
Oh, and when I scolded him he called me mean words in Dutch "cunt, slut, witch". Pffft. Grote klootzakken.
Ain really did wanna kick the poop out of them but I didn't wanna have to throw down so we left. And they pushed him from behind! I am not impressed.

I would have been like "hey drunk guy wanna know what it's like to be fucked by a dinosaur?" And then knee him really hard in the butt.

[at0m]

[quote author=Luinbariel link=topic=3709.msg122407#msg122407 date=1258184961]
I am so fucking sick of dealing with these people. If it is personal, I am further sickened; way to set an example, group of older adults.

Court time
[/quote]this

[Surf314]

[quote author=Caffeine link=topic=3709.msg122418#msg122418 date=1258212397]
[quote author=Luinbariel link=topic=3709.msg122407#msg122407 date=1258184961]
I am so fucking sick of dealing with these people. If it is personal, I am further sickened; way to set an example, group of older adults.

Court time
[/quote]this
[/quote]
If HeK starts on a time machine now I think I can represent you.

[copulatingduck]

very depressing documentary about pedigree dogs

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseac...d=44215931

[Surf314]

I have a pretty super headache right now  >

[KarthXLR]

I have a whole bunch of homework that I waited until today to do.




Oh 'dis is bad.

[SBCrystal]

very depressing documentary about pedigree dogs

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseac...d=44215931

Wow...way to break my heart.

[Benito Mussolini]

[quote author=CopulatingDuck link=topic=3709.msg122584#msg122584 date=1258317861]
very depressing documentary about pedigree dogs

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseac...d=44215931

Wow...way to break my heart.
[/quote]

It even broke mine, and I hate dogs...

[Surf314]

[quote author=SBCrystal link=topic=3709.msg122607#msg122607 date=1258323722]
[quote author=CopulatingDuck link=topic=3709.msg122584#msg122584 date=1258317861]
very depressing documentary about pedigree dogs

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseac...d=44215931

Wow...way to break my heart.
[/quote]

It even broke mine, and I hate dogs...
[/quote]

Thanks for making me think I made the right choice when I didn't click.

Also my wife worked the weekend and when she got home I was like I think I got one of your migraines I had such a bad headache I felt like I was going to throw up all day. She was like did you take something? And I was like take something? You know medication, pills, etc? Ohhhhh so that's how you fix that.

But on the plus side while I was laid out on the couch watching TV I made pillow forts around my sleeping cats. That was a lot of fun.

[at0m]

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,575277,00.html
President of Chicago Board of Education Reportedly Kills Himself

[CaffeinePowered]

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,575277,00.html
http://www.wbez.org/Content.aspx?audioID=38138
President of Chicago Board of Education Reportedly Kills Himself

FTFY