The "Fuck my life" thread

[rumbot]

I like me some koala.

yeah you are goofy and silly and sometimes are prone to be a plastic bag in the wind.

but you are an interesting cat, with fresh and artistic views on things, and a decent human to boot.

I vote for you to stick around.

[Evil Cheese]

Nothing goes right, everything sucks. Feeling bad. I'm a disappointment to Serain because I still haven't done any dance lessons for the ACEN skit and I'm sick as a dog so of course I'd be regretting not exercising when exercising means I get to drown in my own snot.

Having thoughts of maybe everyone would be happier if I wasn't around anymore.

Don't sweat it too much, man. Get yourself healthy first then take care of bidness. If you think the skit is too much, then don't do it. Nobody is going to be disappointed in you. I for one will miss you if you don't come to ACEN.

[at0m]

[quote author=k0ala link=topic=3709.msg273375#msg273375 date=1384310008]
Nothing goes right, everything sucks. Feeling bad. I'm a disappointment to Serain because I still haven't done any dance lessons for the ACEN skit and I'm sick as a dog so of course I'd be regretting not exercising when exercising means I get to drown in my own snot.

Having thoughts of maybe everyone would be happier if I wasn't around anymore.

Don't sweat it too much, man. Get yourself healthy first then take care of bidness. If you think the skit is too much, then don't do it. Nobody is going to be disappointed in you. I for one will miss you if you don't come to ACEN.
[/quote]^this, and I echo some of Rummy's sentiment as well. You're an excellent human. Please stay.

[CaffeinePowered]

[quote author=Evil Cheese link=topic=3709.msg273380#msg273380 date=1384317136]
[quote author=k0ala link=topic=3709.msg273375#msg273375 date=1384310008]
Nothing goes right, everything sucks. Feeling bad. I'm a disappointment to Serain because I still haven't done any dance lessons for the ACEN skit and I'm sick as a dog so of course I'd be regretting not exercising when exercising means I get to drown in my own snot.

Having thoughts of maybe everyone would be happier if I wasn't around anymore.

Don't sweat it too much, man. Get yourself healthy first then take care of bidness. If you think the skit is too much, then don't do it. Nobody is going to be disappointed in you. I for one will miss you if you don't come to ACEN.
[/quote]^this, and I echo some of Rummy's sentiment as well. You're an excellent human. Please stay.
[/quote]

Ditto

[zaneyard]

Nothing goes right, everything sucks. Feeling bad. I'm a disappointment to Serain because I still haven't done any dance lessons for the ACEN skit and I'm sick as a dog so of course I'd be regretting not exercising when exercising means I get to drown in my own snot.

Having thoughts of maybe everyone would be happier if I wasn't around anymore.

I know that feel but for me I feel like no one would notice if I were gone.

[Greatbacon]

[quote author=k0ala link=topic=3709.msg273375#msg273375 date=1384310008]
Nothing goes right, everything sucks. Feeling bad. I'm a disappointment to Serain because I still haven't done any dance lessons for the ACEN skit and I'm sick as a dog so of course I'd be regretting not exercising when exercising means I get to drown in my own snot.

Having thoughts of maybe everyone would be happier if I wasn't around anymore.

I know that feel but for me I feel like no one would notice if I were gone.
[/quote]

Hey, you two, stop being silly.  k0ala you are a cool kat and a welcome presence on IRC among all other things, and zane mah boi, you cool too.  Stick around ya'll, you're a part of the community here if you like it or not.  Nobody is disappointed, everyone just wants to see you at your best and achieving your fullest potential!

Same goes for anyone else feeling similarly #down and #inthedumps

[zaneyard]

I'm just feeling sorry for myself because I haven't gotten laid for like a year or something. I just want to feel pretty.


I mean I know I'm being stupid but fuck I just want someone to pay attention to me for once. Like I know I'm still achieving what I want to and in the end I'm still who I am but if no one appreciates that then it kinda feels like it's all for nothing. Imagine doing something awesome but having no one there to notice. Sure I still did it but it's like the whole tree falling in the forest thing. Sure my perception of something doesn't really change the reality of it all but isn't my perception my reality?

Sometimes I feel like life would be better if I were ignorant.

I just don't understand I go out of my way to let people know that I care about them and it feels like no one returns it. I just feel like there's got to be something wrong with me that no one cares. It's just so god damn hard to be confident when no one ever compliments me. I just don't know how to ignore that feeling. Fuck I pushed away the only person who ever really loved me and now she's gone and I can't ever take that back. Fucking stupid mom killed herself with alcohol and cigarettes. God I fucking hate cigarettes. Such a disgusting stupid thing.

Maybe I should stop thinking about myself so much and work towards improving other people's lives that are less fortunate than I. I think I'm going to research volunteering stuff in the area.

I don't even care that this has no sort of organization at all it's too fucking late I should be sleeping right now.

[k0ala]

Zane: Dude, I'm feelin' that too. No one develops the capacity to love in a void. Even accepting one's own self is hard if one can't feel accepted by others.

These cold meds are fuckin' with me and I miss being healthy and social. I'm hiding my germs away from as many people as I can and the semi-quarantine is making me stir crazy.

Everyone else: Thanks for showing your support. I don't have enough friends to discard any of you. May I never have that many.

[kaese]

[quote author=zaneyard link=topic=3709.msg273384#msg273384 date=1384318730]
[quote author=k0ala link=topic=3709.msg273375#msg273375 date=1384310008]
Nothing goes right, everything sucks. Feeling bad. I'm a disappointment to Serain because I still haven't done any dance lessons for the ACEN skit and I'm sick as a dog so of course I'd be regretting not exercising when exercising means I get to drown in my own snot.

Having thoughts of maybe everyone would be happier if I wasn't around anymore.

I know that feel but for me I feel like no one would notice if I were gone.
[/quote]

Hey, you two, stop being silly.  k0ala you are a cool kat and a welcome presence on IRC among all other things, and zane mah boi, you cool too.  Stick around ya'll, you're a part of the community here if you like it or not.  Nobody is disappointed, everyone just wants to see you at your best and achieving your fullest potential!

Same goes for anyone else feeling similarly #down and #inthedumps
[/quote]

Yes, please don't think that you aren't an important part of the community. I'm so happy to have met you all in person and you are both super nice and cool people. Keep doing the things you like doing for yourselves and not for us or to impress anyone. I'm already impressed by your diverse interests/hobbies and always refer to you guys as my cool online gaming friends who do really cool things with their lives.

[Eschatos]

I'm just feeling sorry for myself because I haven't gotten laid for like a year or something. I just want to feel pretty.

Fuck you man you don't get to get mad about that.  I ain't been laid ever and do I feel suicidal about it? Sometimes, but that's besides the fucking point.

[Kor]

Koala. Zane.

Firstly, internet hugs. Secondly, you're not alone. Thirdly, you're allowed to feel like this, but only so long as you see it for what it is.

Allow me to posit: External expectations.

Consider how many sets of expectations are laid upon a person; Family, friends, co-workers, society. How many of those expectations do you adopt as your own? How much can one assume before it changes from a life you have lead, to one you have followed? Consider the forces behind the expectations you've set upon yourself, and whether they're self-conceived or not. It's an important distinction, as the answers to the motivation to fulfill those expectations lie within.

In the same vein, don't let society define what success is within your own life. External validation is hollow at best; Why shouldn't what you've deemed a success not be?

Finally, on the topic of self-love: Everything you see in that mirror, everything you think about yourself, every notion is you have about yourself. Stop using anothers lens to perceive it. You have to claim ownership of it to change it. If you choose to deny a part of yourself, you deny yourself an opportunity to love yourself. You want to accept yourself as a whole, no picking, no choosing. Spare yourself the self-critique; how can you doubt what you are? It's already there, yours to discover, over a lifetime.

Speaking about myself, I can look at myself and know what I like, and what I don't(but it's still me) and the very best part of having that self-love is being able to smile at the thought of my sense of self. It's taken a lot of internal dialogue to get there, and we're still talking, but the point is to have the the honest conversation.

I believe in you gents, and I believe you will see what I already see in you. <3


One last thing:

No one develops the capacity to love in a void.

I offer a counter-point: Love is not finite. It is the love of an ideal(even in the void) that inspires hope. This is the very definition of inner strength.

[rumbot]

Related to what Kor said, here's a great video on internet culture and being / finding yourself.

it hits full steam around 8 mins, but the whole talk is really good / provocative.

Mike Rugnetta, Idea Channel - XOXO Festival (2013)

[loldollas]

[quote author=k0ala link=topic=3709.msg273375#msg273375 date=1384310008]
Nothing goes right, everything sucks. Feeling bad. I'm a disappointment to Serain because I still haven't done any dance lessons for the ACEN skit and I'm sick as a dog so of course I'd be regretting not exercising when exercising means I get to drown in my own snot.

Having thoughts of maybe everyone would be happier if I wasn't around anymore.

I know that feel but for me I feel like no one would notice if I were gone.
[/quote]

id miss u 4 real


i need a motorbike
return dat favor

[Dtrain323i]

I'm just feeling sorry for myself because I haven't gotten laid for like a year or something. I just want to feel pretty

I'll make you feel pretty. Drop your coat and touch your toes

Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using Tapatalk

[spm201]

Was reminded again today that my family is full of terrible people.

[Surf314]

Zane/k0ala - everyone has their down times and they can even help you get a better perspective on life. But when you are down in your introspection hole don't forget to find that you have a lot to offer the world, and already have. If you need some changes create some changes. If you need some positivity create some positivity. It ain't easy, but it's worth it.

[zaneyard]

holy fuck did I throw a tantrum but you all are awesome thank you.

[quote author=zaneyard link=topic=3709.msg273387#msg273387 date=1384320444]
I'm just feeling sorry for myself because I haven't gotten laid for like a year or something. I just want to feel pretty.

Fuck you man you don't get to get mad about that.  I ain't been laid ever and do I feel suicidal about it? Sometimes, but that's besides the fucking point.
[/quote]

but you're a stud..

[StolenToast]

[quote author=zaneyard link=topic=3709.msg273387#msg273387 date=1384320444]
I'm just feeling sorry for myself because I haven't gotten laid for like a year or something. I just want to feel pretty

I'll make you feel pretty. Drop your coat and touch your toes

Sent from my Galaxy Nexus using Tapatalk
[/quote]The D train is always on time

[spm201]

Went to dinner with the parents which was nice. Then got lectured to afterward about how I am a terrible person, am ruining my life, and the FBI is going to come knocking down my door and arresting me because of it.  I wish I was making this shit up. Haven't lived with them for years, I just don't think they got the message yet. Just about ready to cut ties with these people completely.

[FlyingMongoose]

Went to dinner with the parents which was nice. Then got lectured to afterward about how I am a terrible person, am ruining my life, and the FBI is going to come knocking down my door and arresting me because of it.  I wish I was making this shit up. Haven't lived with them for years, I just don't think they got the message yet. Just about ready to cut ties with these people completely.

I must ask, how and/or why (if it's not too personal) do they think you're ruining your life and that the FBI will come knock down your door?